What did it feel like when you would lie or get confronted about something?
"Panic-stricken. Because you’re being outed for being an addict and for lying and for all those things that you said you’re weren’t doing. You feel sort of gutted. But your mind goes into overdrive, trying to find an escape route. That’s what an addict is always trying to do, find an escape route for being put on the spot — I’ve got to get out of this, I’ve got to deny it. There’s no way I can face up to this ’cause it’s just the hardest thing in the world — it exposes all your weaknesses, all your failings. And any strength you might have to deal with those emotional sorts of things has been eaten away by drugs. So you’ve got no defense mechanism, no way of even comprehending what’s going on. So it becomes an attack on you, and you go into a reverse attack mode. You’ll get really aggressive and defensive and you’ll find any way to get out of it, even if that comes to hurting somebody’s feelings and putting them down and walking away from them and saying you don’t fucking know."
The four words that can instantly break a lesbians heart.
” can my boyfriend come?”
So those of you who do not know- this is me and my best friend Christian Alberto Sierra. Nearly two months ago Christian was shot and killed by a police officer, who responded to a suicide call. My entire town was up in arms about losing him, but as the second month with him gone comes around, people are forgetting, just as people do. Most of them just wanted to be apart of the hype, which is incredibly disappointing. But i will not let his memory simply be forgotten, and i will not stop until the cop is behind bars. But in the small town i live in, the cops are trying as hard as possible to sweep this ‘indescretion” under the rug. So im coming to you guys, my 3,000 followers and begging you to reblog this. Make him known. Too often lives are taken by the corruptions of our authority. So i ask you please- share this, get his story known.
You are 12. You’re at the library looking for some generic young adult fiction novel about a girl who falls for her best friend. Your dad makes a disgusted face. “This is about lesbians,” he says. The word falls out of his mouth as though it pains him. You check out a different book and cry when you get home, but you aren’t sure why. You learn that this is not a story about you, and if it is, you are disgusting.
You are 15. Your relatives are fawning over your cousin’s new boyfriend. “When will you have a boyfriend?” they ask. You shrug. “Maybe she’s one of those lesbians,” your grandpa says. You don’t say anything. You learn that to find love and acceptance from your family, you need a boyfriend who thinks you are worthy of love and acceptance.
You are 18. Your first boyfriend demands to know why you never want to have sex with him. He tells you that sex is normal and healthy. You learn that something is wrong with you.
You are 13. You’re at a pool party with a relative’s friend’s daughter. “There’s this lesbian in my gym class. It’s so gross,” she says. “Ugh, that’s disgusting,” another girl adds. They ask you, “do you have any lesbians at your school?” You tell them no and they say you are lucky. You learn to stay away from people.
You are 20. You have coffee with a girl and you can’t stop thinking about her for days afterwards. You learn the difference between a new friendship and new feelings for a person.
You are 13. Your mom is watching a movie. You see two girls kiss on screen. You feel butterflies and this sense that you identify with the girls on the screen. Your mom gets up and covers the screen. You learn that if you are like those girls, no one wants to see it.
You are 20. You and your friends are drunk and your ex-boyfriend dares you to make out with your friend. You both agree. You touch her face. It feels soft and warm. Her lips are small and her hands feel soft on your back. You learn the difference between being attracted to someone and recognizing that someone you care about is attractive.
You are 16. You find lesbian porn online. Their eyes look dead and their bodies are positioned in a way that you had never imagined. You learn that liking girls is acceptable if straight men can decide the terms.
You are 20. You are lying next to a beautiful girl and talking about everything. You tell her things that you don’t usually tell anyone. You learn how it feels not to want to go to sleep because you don’t want to miss out on any time with someone.
You are 15. Your parents are talking about a celebrity. Your dad has a grin on his face and says, “her girlfriend says that she’s having the best sex of her life with her!” You learn that being a lesbian is about the kind of sex you have and not how you love.
You are 18. You are in intro to women’s and gender studies. “Not all feminists are lesbians- I love my husband! Most of the feminists on our leadership team are straight! It’s just a stereotype,” the professor exclaims. You learn that lesbianism is something to separate yourself from.
You are 21 and you are kissing a beautiful girl and she’s your girlfriend and you understand why people write songs and make movies and stupid facebook statuses about this and time around you just seems to stop and you could spend forever like this and you learn that there is nothing wrong with you and you are falling in love.
You are 21. And you are okay.
— a thing I wrote after arguing with an insensitive dude on facebook all day or Things Other People Taught me about Liking Girls (via squidterritory)
I might write an ND version of this.(via ndsenseandsex)
crying a bit tbh(via crustified-again)
Wow…I’ve never related more to something.
Date someone who is interested in you. I don’t mean someone who thinks you’re cute or funny. I mean someone who wants to know every insignificant detail about you. Someone who wants to read every word you write. Someone who wants hear every note of your favourite song, and watch every scene of your favourite movie. Someone wants to find every scar upon your body, and learn where each one came from. Someone who wants to know your favourite brand of toothpaste, and which quotes resonate deep inside your bones when you hear them. There is a difference between attraction and interest. Find the person who wants to learn every aspect of who you are, and hold onto them.”
Me (via stayy-for-tonight)
You know all those wonderful Conservative parents who proceed to abandon, kick out, or cut off their children for any reason (including, but not limited to a child’s sexuality)?
Well here we go:
“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
1 Timothy 5:8 (NKJV)